Hello IVF troopers,

I am new to IVF, but not new to IF. I have had secondary IF for 8 years. IF is no less painful because I already have a son. Many of us fall into this category. Well-meaning people always seem to say, "Well at least you already have a baby." Gosh, this makes me want to scream. But I guess I can say in their defense that they do not know any better.

Let me tell you a little something about myself. I have an 8-year old son from my previous marriage. I later remarried and my DH and I started working on expanding our family. I have done many rounds of Clomid. 6 cycles I believe. My RE said we should not have a problem. I do ovulate on my own. There is no male factor. My RE also said that our age is a plus. I'm 28 DH is 29. Well 3 years and many, many tests later we still have had no luck.

We then found out I have scarred tubes!!!!!! My RE says this was a result of some infection. I had a lap to remove the scarring and fix my tubes. My RE said it was going to work. Still nothing!!!! My RE suggested IVF last year. I was unsure if insurance would cover IVF and didn't have much cash saved up. We still were hoping that we could get PG on our own.

Well this year we finally said, "Ok IVF here we come." WRONG!!!! We were supposed to start our cycle in March 99, but when the RE did an u/s he found a huge mass on my right ovary. He told us that we couldn't start IVF until it was removed. Ha, I thought it was going to be a little incision, then back off to work. WRONG again!!!! I received a 6-inch scar and 6 weeks off from work.

8 weeks later we were given the OK. We started Lupron in May and all was well. My ovaries were suppressed. Then AF was really late. We went to the RE again and he said not to worry. 2 days later AF showed up. We then went on to stimulation drugs, 4 amps of Fertinex.

Well what would you know! I was not responding well at all. Only 2 visible follicles after 9 days of stims, so our RE cancelled us. Now we have to sit and wait for AF and a change in protocol. The possible protocol will be BCPs and less Lupron and more Fertinex. So this is my IVF Episode 1 and I can only hope to reach IVF part 2.

IF is so very difficult. All the setbacks and delays are even harder. It seems like a dirty trick that someone is playing with all those who want something so badly. But chin up to all. Our dreams will come true. We must all just believe. And some of us have to be patient and wait. This is what I like to call "The Waiting Game." Part 2 to come when I start my new cycle. Good luck to all and IVFers this does work :-)